


Settling down

by Blackghost7



Category: NCIS
Genre: First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-08
Updated: 2015-04-08
Packaged: 2018-03-21 22:32:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3706389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blackghost7/pseuds/Blackghost7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'm not gonna be here forever to cover your ass."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Settling down

   
   
Gibbs sighed as he walked over to where DiNozzo was interviewing the little girl who had witnessed the bank robbers get into a car and speed away from the scene of the crime. DiNozzo certainly had a way with people, talking circles around every adult until they were so confused or exasperated that they let information slip, but when it came to kids, DiNozzo always seemed uncomfortable and tried too hard, something that children saw through immediately, and then they clammed up. DiNozzo hadn’t been around kids much, and so had never learned how to handle them, even though he still behaved like a big kid sometimes himself. If they wanted to get information out of the little girl while it was still fresh in her mind, Gibbs would have to step in.  
   
From the corner of his eye, Tony saw Gibbs making his way over to them and quietly breathed a sigh of relief. Gibbs to the rescue. Tony still didn’t know why Gibbs insisted on him interviewing kids, surely the boss knew by now that that was never successful? When Gibbs reached them, Tony smiled at the girl in what he hoped was a reassuring way and introduced Gibbs as his boss, stepping to the side to let Gibbs start working his magic. Within moments, Gibbs had the girl talking a mile a minute, and Tony took notes of everything she said that might be useful. He’d never understand how Gibbs did that, and quite frankly, he didn’t want to know. Tony and kids were never going to be a good combination. When Gibbs deemed the interview finished and they walked away, the head slap hit as expected.  
   
“You ever gonna learn, DiNozzo?”  
   
Tony winced, but kept his response light.  
   
“Probably not, Boss. Don’t know why you insist on me trying every time.”  
   
“Because you need to be able to interview anybody, Tony. I’m not gonna be here forever to cover your ass.”  
   
Tony’s steps faltered and Gibbs turned back, one eyebrow raised in curiosity at the younger man.  
   
“What?”  
   
“Don’t say that, Boss.”  
   
Then Tony shook his head and strode past Gibbs, ignoring the questioning look, ignoring Gibbs for the remainder of the day.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Tony leaned back on his couch, eyes closed and a pained expression on his face. His migraine had started that afternoon when they were on their way back to the Yard, and nothing he tried brought him any relief. The cause of it was clear. The casual remark Gibbs had thrown at him after the interview with the little girl had almost winded him, and his migraine was a direct result of the tension that had crept up his back and into his skull when it fully registered. Gibbs wasn’t always going to be there. Was he thinking of retiring? Was he thinking of leaving Tony behind? Tony had always thought he still had time, but this simple remark from Gibbs had nearly swept his legs out from under him.  
   
If he was honest with himself, he should have seen it coming of course. He wasn’t a young man anymore, and the older he got, logically the older Gibbs became. But he didn’t feel old, and Gibbs certainly didn’t seem old, he was still the same powerful presence he had always been, and Tony had always felt like it would be that way forever. In his mind’s eye he saw them together still twenty years from now, working cases and spending late nights in the office, sharing steaks and beers on Gibbs’ couch or pizza and bourbon in the basement, helping each other up the stairs late at night and Tony crashing in the guest room. He almost groaned when he realized the unreality of that image. Twenty years from now, Gibbs would be long retired and spending his days somewhere on a beach, probably in Mexico and this time for real, and Tony would probably be dead, because with his luck it was only a matter of time before one of the bad guys got him good, or he had suffered one too many concussions and didn’t come out of it this time, spending the rest of his life as a plant tucked away somewhere in a dank hospital room, forgotten by everyone he’d ever cared about. Tony sighed deeply. It was a bleak prospect, but not out of the realm of possibilities.  
   
Tony spent the night on his couch, drifting off to sleep every now and then, but startling awake from the nightmares those images presented. When it was time to go to the office, he struggled to his feet and cracked his back, feeling older by the second, cataloguing each little ache and pain he felt in his body, and generally feeling sorry for himself. He was a coward.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Gibbs had kept a close eye on DiNozzo ever since that morning. Something had spooked Tony, rattled him, and Gibbs was curious and worried. He’d never seen Tony so down, so dejected, and he hated it. He counted on Tony in more ways than one, and relied on Tony’s ability to find humor and laughter in most situations, lightening the mood with a joke or jibe here and there, and Gibbs couldn’t stand the dark look in Tony’s eyes these days. Gibbs had long since reconciled himself to the fact that he would never have Tony the way he wanted him, but took solace in the knowledge that the younger man was happy and healthy, and that they were friends at least. But friends came to each other for support when something was bothering them, and Tony was conspicuously absent from Gibbs’ house, and pretty much refused to acknowledge him at the office unless a direct request for a sitrep was barked at him. Gibbs wondered whether it had been something he had said or done, but couldn’t figure it out. He contemplated ordering Tony into the elevator or to his basement to get to the bottom of this, but decided against it when he caught yet another dark look from the younger man. Tony wasn’t ready yet, he was working through something, and Gibbs felt in his gut he had to be patient a little longer, and give Tony the opportunity to sort out whatever was bothering him for himself first, before Gibbs could safely try to interfere.  
   
It took a lot of will power and he gritted his teeth every time he caught another dark look, wanting to step in and shake the younger man, demanding to know what was wrong and what was causing the dark circles under his eyes, but he kept himself in check and waited.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Tony had been feeling more and more lonely over the past year, the dynamic of their little family changing, growing apart a little. The interaction with Bishop was different from what he’d had with Ziva and even with Cait, McGee spent more time with Delilah, Abby had Burt and Palmer his new family, even Ducky was spending more time with friends from outside the office. The drinks the team had shared almost weekly in past years had tapered off to once a month, maybe, and even then there was usually at least one of them missing due to other commitments. It seemed they could never find a time anymore when they were all available, and Tony missed it. He still had close contact with some of his frat buddies, but they were dispersed around the country, and while he spoke to them frequently, he hardly ever saw them. As for Senior, well, that was always going to be complicated.  
   
And it was now that he didn’t have the others to fall back on, that he realized the full extent of how much he had relied on them to soften the void in his heart, the emptiness that existed because he would never get what he really wanted. He sighed, and once again called himself a coward. He didn’t really know that he couldn’t have Gibbs, he’d always been too cautious to try. But it had become clear to him long ago that even though he could try to search for someone else, try to settle for something else, that would never work as long as his heart still belonged to Gibbs, even if the older man didn’t know it. He knew he couldn’t just come right out and say it, lay his heart on the line and risk getting it broken, he had been burned in the past too many times to take that chance, especially with the most important person in his life. So what could he do?  
   
A plan formed in the back of his mind. He knew it wasn’t completely honest, and he knew it was a risk, but it was the best he could think of. Perhaps he and Gibbs could strengthen their friendship and build on that, see if something could develop between them from there. He was tired of being lonely, and every now and then he saw signs of the same feeling in Gibbs. Perhaps they could keep each other company, and maybe he could convince Gibbs that they could have something more, that he would do anything for the older man, and then finally drop the bomb that he truly did love him. But how to achieve that? First things first, he needed to get closer to Gibbs, needed to find that rapport again that they had had in their early days, when it was just the two of them. Some of the happiest weeks of his life had been when his apartment was uninhabitable and Gibbs had reluctantly offered him a place to stay. They had had their moments in those weeks, and sometimes Tony had caught Gibbs watching him, and he had thought back then that maybe there could be something between them, but nothing had ever come of it. That was well over a decade ago, and he was not as young or pretty as he had been back then, but still… a small smile crept over his face, the first genuine even if little smile he’d had in weeks. He had to try.  
   
The following day he packed some bags and threw them into his trunk, intending to ask Gibbs whether he could stay with him for a while at the first opportunity. But in the end he didn’t dare, his conscience not allowing him to lie to Gibbs, and the bags remained untouched in the back of his car for days.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Gibbs caught Tony’s surreptitious glances a few times, saw Tony looking at him with big, almost sad eyes, and his heart clenched whenever he caught that look. Tony looked like he wanted to ask him something, but in the end always turned away and shook his head to himself, remaining silent. Gibbs sighed. What had happened between them that Tony didn’t feel he could ask him anything? Had their friendship changed that much? Why didn’t he show up and just talk to Gibbs the way he had always been able to before? Gibbs was able to stand it for four more days, but when he caught that look again, accompanied with a small grimace, he had enough. He sent McGee and Bishop down to Abby for an update, and then stood in front of Tony’s desk. When Tony finally looked up at him, the younger man’s eyes were guarded, and Gibbs’ voice was almost soft.  
   
“DiNozzo. With me.”  
   
Tony followed Gibbs into the elevator and leaned back against the wall, eyes glued to the ground, waiting for the emergency switch to be flipped. When it happened, he didn’t show any reaction, trying to seem casual and relaxed, hands in his pockets and legs crossed at the ankles. Gibbs wasn’t fooled for a second.  
   
“What’s going on with you, Tony?”  
   
The response was immediate and expected.  
   
“Nothing, Boss.”  
   
Gibbs sighed and stepped closer. After a short hesitation, Gibbs reached out his hand and placed it softly on the back of Tony’s head.  
   
“Hey. It’s me you’re talking to.”  
   
The gesture combined with the almost gentle voice made Tony look up, his eyes searching Gibbs’ face. He blinked once, twice, and then took a deep breath.  
   
“Gibbs?”  
   
“Yeah?”  
   
“Can I stay with you for a while?”  
   
That was not what Gibbs had been expecting, but he felt his mood lighten at just the thought of having Tony close.  
   
“Something wrong with your apartment again?”  
   
Tony seemed to hesitate, then lowered his eyes again and gave a tiny shake of his head.  
   
“No…”  
   
Gibbs frowned, but wasn’t about to refuse Tony.  
   
“Okay.”  
   
Tony looked up in surprise.  
   
“Really?”  
   
“Sure. I never mind your company. Come on over whenever you want.”  
   
That earned him the first smile he’d seen on Tony in weeks, and Gibbs felt his heart jump a little, but he was still worried.  
   
“Everything alright, Tony?”  
   
Gibbs could see the automatic response forming and then dying on Tony’s lips. Then the younger man gave a tiny, one-shouldered shrug.  
   
“I really don’t know, Gibbs.”  
   
Gibbs stared at him for a few moments, surprised at the apparent honesty instead of the usual deflection. Then he nodded.  
   
“Okay. Whatever it is, we’ll figure it out. Show up whenever you want.”  
   
“Tonight?”  
   
“Whenever, Tony.”  
   
~~~~~  
   
The rest of the day, Tony was in a better mood already, but still contemplative. He hadn’t been able to lie to Gibbs and in the end he hadn't had to, and it appeased his conscience somewhat, but he disliked that he had given Gibbs reason to worry about him. Nevertheless, he was pleased that the older man still welcomed him, even if he hadn’t really given a reason for his request. Gibbs threw him a couple of glances, but didn’t question him. That evening when Tony showed up at his house, Gibbs actually opened the door for him and helped him carry his things inside, seemingly not surprised at the number of bags that clearly indicated this was not just for a couple of days. They brought Tony’s stuff upstairs, and Gibbs directed him to the master bedroom. At Tony’s surprised look, Gibbs explained.  
   
“Guest room’s full of boxes. I sleep on the couch. You can stay here. I cleared out some closet space for you. Settle in, I’ll order food. Chinese?”  
   
Tony gave a soft nod and stared after Gibbs as the older man turned and made his way back downstairs, then breathed deeply and let himself fall onto the edge of the bed, closing his eyes and just sitting for a moment. He felt better already.  
   
After he had put away his clothes and other things and freshened up in the bathroom, Tony went downstairs to find that Gibbs had lit a fire and was relaxing on the couch with a beer, another beer ready and waiting for Tony. They settled in comfortable silence and nursed their beers until the food arrived, then ate, the mood between them calm and relaxed. After dinner, Gibbs went down to the basement and Tony joined him there, carefully starting up some chatter, trying to see if it would annoy Gibbs, but the older man just quirked his lips in a pleased little expression and so Tony kept talking. When it was time to go to bed, Tony gave Gibbs space to use the bathroom upstairs, then retreated after Gibbs had returned to the living room and settled on the couch. Tony crawled into the bed, and slept well for the first time in months, just the knowledge that he was in Gibbs’ bed calming him and making him feel better.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Over the next couple of days they settled back into the routine remembered from all those years ago. Tony shopped for groceries and cooked, Gibbs did laundry and washed dishes. Sometimes Gibbs spent the evening in the basement alone while Tony watched a movie, sometimes Tony joined the older man downstairs. On Saturday, Gibbs worked in the yard and Tony assisted, then Tony went shopping and prepared an elaborate dinner, after which they both settled on the couch to watch a game. On Sunday, Gibbs took Tony to the marina and had him help prepare the boat for summer, cleaning it out and checking for things that needed to be fixed, and that evening, Tony sat on the basement stairs and watched Gibbs carve an intricate pattern into a piece of wood. Gibbs had noticed the dark circles disappearing from under Tony’s eyes, and seen the twinkle return to those green orbs, and felt calmer himself now that he had Tony close and could keep an eye on him. That didn’t mean he wasn’t still curious, though.  
   
“You ready to tell me what’s going on yet, Tony?”  
   
Tony stared at Gibbs a few moments, then softly shook his head. Gibbs eyed him carefully, then with a shrug, let it go. For now.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Days turned into weeks, and they felt comfortable and settled. When a hard case had them working four days straight, both breathed a sigh of relief when they finally closed the door behind them and were glad not to be alone. When Gibbs came downstairs after using the bathroom and changing into his sleeping sweats, Tony saw the hard line of his mouth every time he put weight on his bad knee, and he hesitated only a moment before getting Gibbs settled on the couch and bringing him an ice pack to relieve the pain. Gibbs muttered a soft word in thanks, and Tony reached out his hand to brush it over the older man’s hair as Gibbs’ eyes fell closed, then whispered softly before he made his way upstairs.  
   
“Goodnight, Jethro.”  
   
Gibbs hid the small smile those words caused in the dark.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Tony watched for any signs that Gibbs might feel something for him, and caught a few glances now and then that he thought might be significant. The first time Gibbs walked in on him while he was in the shower and Gibbs didn’t turn away immediately, he smiled to himself the entire day. Behind closed doors, Tony called him Jethro and Gibbs smiled when he did, and small touches between them felt natural and occurred more and more often. Whenever Tony handed Gibbs a drink or dinner, their fingers lingered a little. When Gibbs went down to the basement and he passed Tony on the couch, he slid his fingers through Tony’s hair. When Gibbs showed Tony how to carve a piece of the pattern one night, he guided Tony’s hands for over half an hour, leaning over the younger man, his chest pressed against Tony’s back and his arms surrounding him from behind.  
   
The natural and comfortable progression went into overdrive the day Gibbs got hurt.  
   
Gibbs managed to dive out of the way of the car and fire twice before he hit the ground, and his training prevented any serious injuries, but Gibbs still came away from the encounter with plenty of scrapes and bruises, and Tony refused to let the older man sleep on the couch that night. It took some persuading, and in the end Gibbs agreed only to placate Tony, but he breathed a soft sigh of relief when he settled into the comfort of the bed while Tony was in the bathroom. Breathing deeply, Gibbs took in Tony’s scent which now clung to the pillows and duvet, and smiled a little at that, feeling calm and relaxed with Tony’s scent surrounding him. Tony came out of the bathroom dressed just in sleeping shorts, and hesitated only a moment before he walked over the bed and sat cross legged on top of the duvet on the unoccupied side of the bed, the side he’d been sleeping on the past few weeks. He looked as much like a little kid as a grown man in his forties possibly could, but there was pain in his eyes.  
   
As soon as Gibbs had gotten hurt, Tony had heard the echo of those words in his mind.  
   
“I’m not gonna be here forever to cover your ass.”  
   
He’d known then that it was time. He couldn’t hide any longer. His long fingers plucked at the duvet while he stared down in the semi-darkness of the room.  
   
“Jethro?”  
   
“Hmmm?”  
   
“You scared me today.”  
   
Gibbs reached out his hand and carefully closed his fingers around Tony’s. Then he broke his own rule.  
   
“I’m sorry about that, Anthony. I didn’t mean to.”  
   
Nodding in the almost dark, Tony replied.  
   
“I know. Still scared me though.”  
   
A deep sigh from the younger man.  
   
“I can’t lose you, Jethro.”  
   
Gibbs was silent for a few moments, then breathed deeply.  
   
“You won’t.”  
   
“But you said…”  
   
The small voice and the vulnerability in Tony’s bearing made Gibbs lose his inhibitions, and the words slipped out before he could keep himself in check.  
   
“What did I say, my sweet boy?”  
   
Gibbs heard Tony’s breathing speed up, and saw the sparkle in those beautiful eyes even in the near dark of the room. Tony’s voice was tight with emotion when he finally responded.  
   
“You said you wouldn’t be here for me forever.”  
   
Gibbs nodded to himself. Over the weeks he had come to suspect what had caused Tony to ask if he could stay, and he’d seen the little signs and hoped. He wasn’t going to lie, it was time to speak the truth.  
   
“I probably won’t. But I’m still here now. And I need you as much as you think you need me.”  
   
“You do?”  
   
“Yes, Anthony. I need you.”  
   
Gibbs took another deep breath and then plunged forward.  
   
“And I love you.”  
   
Tony sat in silence for long minutes, staring down at the man he loved. When Tony at last moved and got off the bed, Gibbs worried for a moment whether he had read everything wrong after all. But then Tony lifted the duvet and crawled in next to Gibbs, carefully settling himself against the older man and wrapping his arm around Gibbs, burying his face into the crook of Gibbs’ neck.  
   
“I love you too, Jethro. It’s why I asked if I could come stay.”  
   
Gibbs breathed out a quiet sigh of relief, then pressed his lips to the top of Tony’s head.  
   
“I know, my darling boy. And thank you for being brave enough to take that step.”  
   
They slept peacefully and easily that night, carefully wrapped around each other.  
   
~~~~~  
   
The following morning, Tony woke up to find awake blue eyes gazing at him from up close, and smiled a sleepy smile. The blue stare softened even further immediately, and a small smile appeared on the stern lips below. Tony reached up and gently pressed his own lips against those quirked ones, getting a soft moan of approval, which made him smile into the kiss. Gibbs brought up his hand and softly brushed his fingers through Tony’s hair as they lay there side by side, exchanging chaste kisses. When Tony’s alarm on his phone went off to alert him it was time to get up, he smiled a little ruefully.  
   
“Jethro?”  
   
Gibbs hummed while he gave Tony another kiss.  
   
“Do you think my boss would let me take the day off? Maybe take one off himself too?”  
   
Gibbs pulled back and stared into the green eyes twinkling with mischief.  
   
“What did you have in mind?”  
   
“Lounging around in bed all day? After all, my boss was hurt, and he needs time to recover, needs me to take care of him. If he takes the day off today, we’d have a long weekend…”  
   
Gibbs smirked.  
   
“Nice try, DiNozzo, but you owe me a report.”  
   
The pout and puppy dog eyes Tony gave him were deeply impressive. Gibbs’ smirk softened into a small smile.  
   
“Tell you what…”  
   
This time Tony hummed while kissing Gibbs.  
   
“…if you hurry with your report and have it on his desk by noon, maybe your boss will release you early today.”  
   
Tony gave Gibbs one more quick kiss, then threw off the duvet and hurried to the bathroom, eager to get to the office and finish his report so Gibbs could make good on his promise. Gibbs laughed out loud and Tony grinned when he heard the rare sound.  
   
~~~~~  
   
McGee and Bishop raised an eyebrow in question when they arrived at the office and found Tony at his desk, typing away furiously. When Tony started egging them on to finish their own reports, they were amused, but did in fact put a little more speed into it. It was ten minutes before noon that Tony delivered all three reports to Gibbs’ desk, throwing pleading eyes at his boss. Gibbs’ only response was another small quirk of his lips, and infuriatingly, Gibbs went for coffee first before he settled at his desk again to review the reports. Tony’s leg was bouncing impatiently under his desk the entire time Gibbs was reading, and Gibbs looked at him with an amused smirk every now and then from over the tops of his reading glasses. Every time he caught that gaze, Tony pleaded silently with his eyes. Finally Gibbs placed his signature on the reports and released them for the weekend, McGee and Bishop pleased with the extra hours off, Tony anxious. So anxious in fact, that he actually arrived home before Gibbs, despite the older man’s usual maniacal driving. Tony waited impatiently for Gibbs to arrive.  
   
When Gibbs at last stepped through the door, Tony had his hands on him in an instant, pressing his back against the door and cupping a hand to either side of Gibbs’ face. Then everything stilled. The nervous anxiety left Tony immediately, and he just looked at his lover, trailing his eyes over the silver hair and blue eyes, the handsome face, until at last they locked on Gibbs’ lips. Very slowly Tony leaned in and softly kissed Gibbs, taking his bottom lip between his own, and then the top one, then full on contact. He felt Gibbs’ hands slide up from his hips to his sides and his back, gently pulling him closer, and when Gibbs opened his lips, Tony carefully entered Gibbs’ mouth with his tongue, tasting and feeling him, then letting Gibbs return the gesture. Time lost its meaning while they stood there, completely dazed by the feeling of each other at last, and it was sweet and gentle.  
   
Later Tony couldn’t recall how they had made their way to the shower without tumbling down the stairs, he just remembered standing there under the warm spray, tasting and touching Gibbs, and being tasted and touched in return. He didn’t know how they made it to the bed, just recollected mapping Gibbs’ body with his hands and mouth, and being driven insane by Gibbs doing the same to him. Clarity only returned when they finally locked together, Gibbs sliding into him carefully, their eyes fastened on each other. It was everything he’d ever dreamed of, and when Gibbs made him fly and went with him over the edge, it was better than he ever could have imagined. When he woke up, he found himself being held in his lover’s strong arms encircling from behind, Gibbs’ chin resting on his shoulder, Gibbs’ leg between his, and he had never felt more happy in his entire life.  
   
~~~~~  
   
They continued like that for weeks, every second spent out of the office spent together, touching each other, loving each other. It was like they were on their honeymoon, and both had to control themselves when other people were around. They had already made several trips to Tony’s apartment to pick up more of his things, and Tony was ready to make it official. One evening they were lounging together on the couch, Gibbs resting against Tony’s chest, fingers entangled and playing together, when Tony brought it up.  
   
“Jethro?”  
   
Gibbs brought their interlaced fingers to his mouth and kissed them before responding.  
   
“Yes, my darling boy?”  
   
Tony couldn’t help the smile that spread over his lips at the endearment. Gibbs didn’t use them often, but when he was in a mood like this, he slipped them in effortlessly, and Tony always melted when he did.  
   
“You think there’s room for my piano in your house?”  
   
Gibbs turned a little in his lover’s embrace so he could look at him.  
   
“It’s your home too, you know.”  
   
“It is?”  
   
“Of course.”  
   
That smile again. Gibbs took a deep breath and spoke.  
   
“I was thinking we could move everything in here this weekend?”  
   
Tony’s eyes widened a little.  
   
“If you want, my sweet boy. If you’re ready to, you know, settle down with an old man.”  
   
Helpless laughter escaped Tony’s lips for a moment, but his eyes burned with fire and desire. Then he became serious and kissed Gibbs deeply before gazing into his lover’s eyes and responding earnestly, but with a gleaming twinkle in his green orbs.  
   
“I don’t know about old men… but I’ve been ready to settle down with you for years, my love.”  
   
Gibbs stared at him for long moments with a soft look in his eyes, his voice husky when he at last spoke.  
   
“Call me that again?”  
   
Tony placed a chaste kiss to Gibbs’ lips, then complied, his voice hoarse with desire.  
   
“Jethro, my love…”  
   
It was a long time before either of them spoke again, the only sounds echoing through the house the resonation of their passion.  
   
   
 


End file.
